I'm terrible!!

I'm really terrible at keeping up with things like this. I haven't blogged in forever and I was all about it when I started. I need more stick-to-it-ivness. This goes into every part of my life. I'll work out for a little while religiously then stop suddenly or eat healthier and just stop for a nice candy bar or doughnut. For me to be successful I can't have the temptation around, it's hard to have chips and candy in the house and not eat it.

Anywho, this mind set goes way back for me. I've always quit things and my mom knew it. I took about a month of karate and about a month of piano...both of these I wish I would have done longer but I didn't. Now my mother caught on to this trend and that's why I'm an eagle scout, because she wouldn't let me quit again until I got all the way through. I sometimes forget that I made that accomplishment and other people seem to think it's a huge accomplishment. Boy Scouts wasn't crazy fun for me. I generally felt out of place there because I'm not really super into competition. I feel as though if they had made it less about competition and more about everyone helping each other succeed it would have been a more cohesive experience for me. I don't remember much of boy scouts, which leads me to believe something terrible happened to me while I was in boy scouts but that could also just my paranoia and hypochondria.

spending less money

In an attempt to spend less money I've decided to TRY and start making my own lunch because when I get to work and everyone is talking about lunch I just want a little bit of everything and I overeat and spend waaaaayyyyy tooo much. So here goes. Also, if anyone has any ideas on healthy, light lunches I can make at home let me know :-D

Welcome Back The Past

Rusty and Nicole have come and gone filling me with mixed emotions. I wish they could have stayed longer but I'm not sure I could have stayed standing lol. We did a lot of driving, even in the snow...you may or may not know that snow terrifies me. We had a really good time though, well I can only speak for myself but I had fun visiting some old haunts and seeing some old friends.

Seeing Rusty would be plenty, I didn't really need to do anything else. I do wish we could have stayed at mom and dad's a couple of night but maybe next time that will be plausible. He gets to come home so little because of his job and I know mom loves it when he comes for her birthday. Nicole coming on Thursday was great too. We talk pretty much everyday on google wave and I think our in person relationship pretty much exactly replicates those conversations lol.

I loved seeing Sarah, Jordan and their kids. So many memories come back. Sarah being the first real friend I made at college, also the first person I honestly thought I could tell my secrets to, and the first person to go to Vice Versa with me when it was still Class Act lol. It's evident almost immediately that they are great parents and two of the most compatible people ever lol.

I hadn't seen Janice in I couldn't say how long. I pretty much always knew she'd be a great mom and seeing her juggle THREE kids at lunch was great fun. We were reminded of when we were younger and played super heroes and he man/she ra. I should blog about some of those old days.

Seeing places like Morgantown and Fairmont really brought a lot back. It was odd in a way to be there because many of the people I knew when I lived in those places have moved on. Driving by all of the old places I lived, each place holding a story, a memory...remembering mostly silly things...like how every time I mopped the kitchen in the hardwood floor apartment the mop turned red because the floor was bleeding or the dance studio or that constant beeping coming from the kitchen in mine and Steve's place, although we never heard the beeping unles someone else brought it up. The flood in mine and Josh's Morgantown place and me not knowing what else to do but call him in Ohio and him telling me if I was going to get on the computer to get it off the wet floor first lol. Long John Silvers with Lori almost every Sunday....I could go on and on and might in other blogs...

this has turned into yet another blog not ending up where I thought...

It's odd to think about the days that are happening right now and how they will some day be fond memories. It's probably not good to think that way because it takes you away from living in the moments and really enjoying them. I'm working toward really trying to just let go and be IN moments...really IN them and not just on the side. Life is fleeting, moments pass with every second, time is taken for granted and forgotten. Even if a moment isn't everything we want it to be it's still there for us to just enjoy it, take it for what it is and live IN it.... k that's it lol